John Carter (2012):

Starring:

Taylor Kitsch - John Carter

Lynn Collins - Dejah Thoris

Samantha Morton - Sola

Willem Dafoe - Tars Tarkas

Thomas Haden Church - Tal Hajus

Mark Strong - Matai Shang

Ciaran Hinds - Tardos Mors

Dominic West - Sab Than

James Purefoy - Kantos Kan

Bryan Cranston - Powell

Polly Walker - Sarkoja

Daryl Sabara - Edgar Rice Burroughs

Director:

Andrew Stanton (Finding Nemo; WALL-E)

Synopsis:

Transplanted to Mars, a Civil War vet discovers a lush planet inhabited by 12-foot tall barbarians. Finding himself a prisoner of these creatures, he escapes, only to encounter a princess who is in desperate need of a savior. 

Review:

There was tons of negative backlash on this film from film critics & movie fans alike. Completely warranted. OK so here's a very simple run down of it. This film was supposedly "in the making for 100 years", or at least according to the blu-ray bonus features. It also claims that "without this story there would have been no Star Wars or no Avatar" yet it wasn't made until after Avatar was such a huge success makes me question the truth behind this statement. There is also no proof at all that without this story all of those other films wouldn't have spawned any other films similar to it. Just because one man can think up a story in the early 1900's that no one else between then & now would have came up with something even remotely similar. OK so now from the early stages of this film to the actual film itself. I'm not even sure where to start. So the beginning is very congested & not descriptive enough to explain a lot that you are apparently suppose to already know. So I could make a post that was incredibly long, but I actually want people to read it, or the majority of it so I'll just keep it simple & to the point. It really is Disney's answer to Avatar only the complete opposite. Avatar highest grossing film of all time, John Carter is the biggest flop in the history of film costing Disney a $200 Million dollar loss for the quarter. So there is absolutely nothing original about the story or plot at all. Everything was taken from other films over the past oh I don't know 40 years? The acting is a horrible shame. So John Carter is a man, post-civil war who is in search of a cave of gold. As he is arrested by Colonel Powell's (portrayed by Bryan Cranston) he eventually escapes to the mountains where he discovers his cave of gold. Once he's there he is discovered by a world traveller from Mars known as a "Thern" who he ends up killing & as he is dieing he grabs a medallion that he was carrying & repeats the words that are being spoken by the dieing Thern, which automatically transports him to Mars. So #1, Carter is suppose to be from the frontier post-civil war world of America, yet all of his dialogue sounds like he's from modern day America. Also Taylor Kitsch takes the Christian Bale "Batman" style of acting, speaking very deep & raspy & over the top dark on everything. #2, for a guy from the 1800's, he is not at all in shock & awe about anything that he is discovering in the futuristic & developed space world of Mars, nor the fact that he is seeing creatures that have 6 arms, are green & speak a completely stupid alien language. #3 so when he first wakes up on Mars, he discovers that he can't walk properly, presumably because Mars has a much different gravity than Earth. So you have a what I'm sure Disney believed was a funny slap stick scene of him attempting to walk & failing miserably. So once he adjusts to the gravity of the planet he discovers that not only can he walk on the planet now, he can magically jump & leap over large spans of ground with ease. The stupidest part is that he starts off with not being able to even walk period, not even a single step, then he develops the ability to jump half way around & across the desert with out any practice or experience. Then once he is discovered by the alien race they are completely obsessed with him being able to jump & are attempting to force him like they are some form of idiots even thought they are completely superior to him in both physicality & development. Then you have the other side of the planet which has humanoid aliens, that look & act the same as humans who they have never even met or seen them. Every CGI animated character in this film looks like something out of the first (newest) three Star Wars films. The scenes, the back drops, sets everything looks like it came out of those three films. Which isn't much of a surprise because Disney owns Lucas films. There are so many great actors in this film, maybe from now on they should consider being a little more choosy with their roles. Mark Strong, Dominic West, Ciaran Hinds, James Purefoy & Thomas Haden Church all deserve so much better than this. Overall the plot is unoriginal, visual effects can only take you so far, even in this it doesn't take you very far AT ALL. Even the fact that there are some incredibly hot women in the film can't save it. I think Lynn Collins is so beautiful & they really did make her look great throughout the entire film. But it wasn't enough. The poor man's Avatar, which is the poor man's rip off of all the movie's Avatar was a rip off of. It really shit the bed. (I could have gone so much further with this but I kept it read able).

Rotten Tomatoes: 52%

Flixster: 63%

44%

Lead Acting: 6/15

Supporting Cast: 7/15

Plot: 3/10

Compared To The Genre: 2/10

Cinematography: 12/20

Intrigue: 11/20

Extra: 3/10