In Time (2011):

Starring:

Justin Timberlake - Will Salas

Cillian Murphy - Raymond Leon

Amanda Seyfried - Sylvia Weis

Olivia Wilde - Rachel Salas

Johnny Galecki - Borel

Michael William Freeman - Nardin

Vincent Katheiser - Philippe Weis

Adam Jamal Craig - Girard

Director:

Andrew Niccol (Gattaca; Lord Of War)

Synopsis:

In a future where people stop aging at 25, but are engineered to live only one more year, having the means to buy your way out of the situation is a shot at immortal youth. Here, Will Salas finds himself accused of murder and on the run with a hostage - a connection that becomes an important part of the way against the system.

Review:

The Future. Where Time is money.... literally. Instead of a world run by moolah, the world is purely run on how much time is left on your life. At some point in the future (never actually explained to us) someone, mostly likely "The Man" developed a way to I guess genetically enhance babies in the womb so that they have a built in timer in their arm? So when they turn 25, they get one year left on their life, unless they work, beg, borrow, steal to get more time. This must be come magical future where they have unlimited resources. Because as far as THIS future goes, the most advanced technology were looking at is more ipad's that keep getting better. Maybe by this time in the real future we'll be carrying around ipads the size of medium sized TV's.The general concept of the movie is that it's a commentary of the 1% controlling the 99%. That there is enough to share for everyone, but they don't so that the poor people die. You get your fair share of action, drama, gun fights all that jazz. The creepy part is that, you never age physically past 25, so no matter how old you are, that's what you will look like for the rest of your life. So.... you could be banging someone who's over 100.... just think about that! Yuck. I was super excited to see this film when I saw trailers for it. But after seeing it, I don't know what it was but I really had to think about why I didn't like it as much as I thought I would. I still honestly don't know why I'm not super high on it. The acting wasn't bad, the action was good, the storyline was pretty good. Just something I guess I can't put my finger on. It's not a bad film at all, I'm sure you might like it. Small role by Big Bang Theory Star Johnny Galecki is pretty good. Also Angel's son, Connor from the TV Show Angel....Not a selling factor but hey, thought I'd point it out.

S.P.R.: B-/40

Acting: 8/10

Plot: 8/10

Cinematography: 8/10

Intrigue: 8/10

Extra: 8/10

Drive (2011):

Starring:

Ryan Gosling - Driver

Carey Mulligan - Irene

Bryan Cranston - Shannon

Albert Brooks - Bernie Rose

Oscar Isaac - Standard

Christina Hendricks - Blanche

Ron Perlman - Nino

Director:

Nicolas Winding Refn (Bronson, Valhalla Rising)

Synopsis:

A mysterious Hollywood stuntman, mechanic and getaway driver lands himself in trouble when he helps out his neighbour.

Review:

Drive (Pause far dramatic effect), A film full of (Pause for dramatic effect) incredible action (Pause for musical interlude), intense drama (Pause for dramatic musical interlude) & umm.... Pauses for dramatic effect? There are just as many pauses for dramatic effect & musical interludes than Ryan Gosling actually has lines in the film. After every major event it happens. After every action sequence, it happens. After any romantic or emotional moment it happens. Nice tight close up on Gosling's face while he does his serious look, pull back slowly while playing 80's sounding music to reveal him brooding or intensely driving. When this film was first advertised everyone had it billed as a remake or reboot of The Transporter franchise. However it could not be further from that. The plot may be somewhat similar, a man who does driving jobs for criminals & is so good that he makes the cop cars following do the classic car chase flip overs & slamming into things. Major differences between Drive & The Transporter franchises are massive however. In the Transporter, Jason Statham has a very 100% intense, in your face, angry, fist fighting style of character. In Drive Gosling is very reserved & passive for the majority of the movie until the midway point when things slowly start to change. The acting in the film has an incredible supporting cast that really makes the movie what it is. Despite the fact that Gosling's character, simply known as "Driver" or sometimes called "The Kid" in the film, only has about 25 minutes of actual dialogue & maybe 15 minutes of reactions, he still does an incredible job of showing emotion & reacting to his surroundings. Who would have thought that the dad from "Malcolm In The Middle" would become such an amazing, talented & believable dramatic actor. Bryan Cranston went from running around in his underwear in Malcolm to, well, running around in his underwear in Breaking Bad to now being a major character actor in Hollywood blockbusters. He has such a talent of making you feel sorry for him even though his characters usually don't feel sorry for themselves. He is by far the best part of the film even with his smaller role. Albert Brooks (who to be honest I didn't realize was still making movies, let alone still alive) played a role very outside of his usual spectrum of characters. Generally known as a comedian, his role as a big time crime boss is a smart change from his earlier roles. Carey Mulligan was her usual self. I'm not a huge fan, I think mainly because she has the face of a 12-year old boy. Don't know if short hair helps either. Her acting isn't terrible, but it's not incredibly memorable. Ron Perlman basically plays what I would assume is himself. Soundtracks can sometimes make or break a film. This one is SO important to the success & plot of the film. Could be in my top 5 soundtracks of all time. Two of my favourite songs coming from the soundtrack are: Kavinsky Feat. Lovefoxxx - Nightcall & College Feat. Electric Youth - A Real Hero. Both fit right in with the style of the film. A very surprising aspect of the film is the gore factor. Really did not expect the amount of raw violence in this one. I knew there might be some face punching, shooting, maybe even an explosion or two. But i certainly did NOT expect the gruesome amount of fu-cking-awesome blood & gore going on in this one. LOVED IT! YOU SHOULD SEE THIS FILM!

S.P.R.: A/46

Acting: 9/10

Plot: 8/10

Cinematography: 9/10

Intrigue: 10/10

Extra: 10/10

The Hunger Games (2012):

Starring:

Jennifer Lawrence - Katniss Everdeen

Josh Hutcherson - Peeta Mellark

Woody Harrelson - Haymitch Abernathy

Stanley Tucci - Caesar Flickerman

Wes Bentley - Seneca Crane

Liam Hemsworth - Gale Hawthorne

Elizabeth Banks - Effie Trinket

Lenny Kravitz - Cinna

Donald Sutherland - President Snow

Alexander Ludwig - Cato

Isabelle Fuhrman - Clove

Toby Jones - Claudius Templesmith

Director:
Gary Ross (Big; Seabiscuit)

Synopsis:

Set in a future where the Capitol selects a boy and girl from the twelve districts to fight to the death on live television, Katniss Everdeen volunteers to take her younger sister's place for the latest match

Review:

Ah yet another Tween phenomenon that I was hoping I would never be involved in. Much like the Harry Potter, Twilight Or Justin Bieber years of past. Yet here I am, one day removed from seeing this film in theaters. I needed a night to sleep on it, whether or not I liked, disliked or thought that Rush Hour 3 was better than this film. After a somewhat good nights sleep, I have made my decision. This movie runs 2 1/2 hours long, but it felt MUCH longer. First off, from the start of the film it feels like it is immediately catering to people who have read the books because the characters through their dialogue are bringing up past events as if you already are suppose to know them. They also don't go into any sort of detail on the current world & exactly how The Hunger Games work. How your name gets placed into the list of names to be picked, or what can get your name put in more. Everything is implied & for someone like myself who didn't know anything about the film/books other than seeing a trailer it was confusing. Then after sitting through the first hour, although it honestly felt like more, I already felt that I had sat through an entire movie already just from the build up of the selection, then the transporting, then the training, then the promotions & interviews. I personally didn't feel any sort of connection to the character through any of the dialogue that occurred during this portion of the film. The only saving grace was Woody Harrelson's awesome role as a former winner who is now Katniss & Peeta's mentor. Question. Can Woody ever play a character NOT gay? Not quite sure he knows the difference between washed up drunk & secret gay. From here, we FINALLY get to the arena where they will be having their little games. It makes me wonder though, if they didn't want them to have uprisings in the poorer districts to keep the rich, rich & the poor, poor. Then why the hell would they choose children to battle it out? Having your child taken away from you & forced to kill or be killed would make their parents go ape shit & start a murderous rampage. If they really wanted to get their message across they would have taken the most in shape, educated, powerful people from the districts & forced them to kill each other, so they wouldn't have a Spartacus on their hands. But anyways, once you finally get to the arena, as they are raised up from underneath & the countdown beings for them to grab weapons, food, survival gear, your thinking FINALLY! business is about to pick up.... But then you remember, oh yeah it's a damn kids movie. Which totally ruins any aspect of gladiators or battles that they would have because it's PG-13 (or whatever it is, I'm way too lazy to actually look) So you get nothing but quick cutaways, thrusts into nothing & falling down acting dead because you couldn't show anything. Now enough about the plot, because if any of you (I'm assuming anyone reads this stupid thing) want to see it, I don't want to spoil EVERYTHING, so I am going to skip to the cinematography of this one. I felt like I was watching what it would look like if Tim Burton was raped by Lady GaGa & they used their child as the production, set & costume designer on this film. Why does everything in the future have to look like everyone is the opposite of colour blind? I kept waiting for Beetlejuice to jump out & skeeze his way into the real world. The fact is, they used concepts & ideas from every futuristic movie that has been made over the past 25 years. I saw glimpses of Total Recall, Fifth Element, even the newer Star Wars movies. Why can't everything just be normal in the future? Remember when people thought we were going to have colonies on the moon & mars in the year 1999 in the 20's & 30's? Now obviously there is a huge market for this film, I mean you don't have the 3rd highest opening weekend gross of all time (The last Harry Potter & The Dark Knight for those of you scoring at home) but it's pretty obvious that said demographic is clearly not a 25 year old male who can grasp concepts & see plot holes! I was mislead by Andrea Muzzin & Anya Cengic as well. Shame on you ladies for telling me it would be good! OH ALSO! The creepy girl from Orphan is in it, slightly less creepy, but not by much! The acting actually wasn't that bad at all. I thought Lenny Kravitz was pretty good considering the lack of acting he's done. It was hard watching 82-year old Donald Sutherland attempt to not get winded standing & the ending scene of him walking up the stairs (that they cut after 1 stair), but he was still just as imposing a figure as always. Then you get little Josh Hutcherson all grown up. I noticed though the awkward chemistry between He & Lawrence. Also keep your eyes pealed for genetically enhanced super bees & ridiculous looking CGI dogs? or wolves? I couldn't really tell.

S.P.R.: C/34

Acting: 8/10

Plot: 5/10

Cinematography: 6/10

Intrigue: 7/10

Extra: 8/10 (Only for Woody Harrelson)

Faces In The Crowd (2011):

Starring:

Milla Jovovich - Anna Marchant

Julian McMahon - Sam Kerrest

David Atrakchi - Lanyon

Michael Shanks - Bryce

Marianne Faithfull - Dr. Langenkamp

Director: Julien Magnat

Synopsis:

A horror-thriller centered on a woman living with "face-blindness" after surviving a serial killer's attack. As she lives with her condition, one in which facial features change each time she loses sight of them, the killer closes in. 

Review:

If I were an Hollywood actor. And I was asked to be in a film, where my romantic interest was played by Milla Jovovich, I Don't think even if I channeled Marlon Brando, that I could even pretend to act like I was physically attracted to her. But even so, once you get past her Euro-trash exterior, you get her horrible, awful acting style. The woman who in every other movie plays the same character she did in the Resident Evil movies, when she is playing a non-physically demanding role, where she has to play a helpless, scared woman the only thing she can do is become a paranoid, borderline schizophrenic. The concept of the film is stupid. She gets so scared that she can't recognize faces of anyone, even if she knows them. (I understand that this is supposedly a real traumatic symptom), but you get to spend the whole movie watching Milla be confused as to who this person is, does she know them & pretend that she knows how to act. The one saving grace of the film, is the constant face changes that she sees. They hired legit 20 actors/actresses that all looked about 90% the same, so that every time she saw someone they would look similar but different at the same time. Sometimes they would be in the same scene where they would go off camera & then come back on camera looking different. Julian McMahon (Dr. Doom himself) grows a terrible looking mustache & put on what looks like 20lbs of fat in his face for this movie. Either that or he realized after Nip/Tuck his career has peaked so he's taken the Val Kilmer route of, who gives a fuck what I look like, I'll take any role they offer me, stance. The movie has 10 minutes of action at the beginning & 10 minutes of action at the end. Everything in between is completely forgettable & I would say irrelevant considering I watched it & can't remember anything that happens in the middle.

S.P.R.: D/27

Acting: 5/10

Plot: 5/10

Cinematography: 9/10

Intrigue: 4/10

Extra: 4/10

The People Under The Stairs (1991):

Starring:

Brandon Adams - Fool

Everett McGill - Man

Wendy Robie - Woman

A.J. Langer - Alice

Ving Rhames - Leroy

Sean Whalen - Roach

Bill Cobbs - Grandpa Booker

Kelly Jo Minter - Ruby Williams

Director:

Wes Craven (Scream's 1-4; Nightmare On Elm Street)

Synopsis:

Two adults and a juvenile burglar break into a house occupied by a brother and sister and their stolen children and can't escape. 

Review:

"Wes Craven's The People Under The Stairs", more like "Wes Craven's Creepy Fetish Made Into A Movie". Not quite a snuff film, but by no means a horror film. There are so many things that I do not understand about this film. WHY does the Man dress up in a full masochistic s&m bondage costume to try & hunt down the kid? Are they husband & wife or brother & sister? OR BOTH!?!?! I like the concept of the film more than the actual film. Kidnapping kids & forcing them to love you as if they were their real parents, Fantastic. When they turn out to be little punks, cutting out their tongues & trapping them "Under The Stairs", very cool. But first of all, when you have that many teenage boys locked together under the stairs, not only are you going to promote some man on man lovin' but you have to expect that most of them would probably kill each other off. Then you get the fantastic acting of Mr. Ving Rhames playing a black panther Esq character, who surprise surprise is also a criminal. To round it all off, once you get the crazy Man in the S&M suite, he starts running around the house, wildly firing a shot gun at the walls, presumably getting himself all riled up to do it with his sister/wife. Playing the main kid, is Brandon Adams, of The Mighty Ducks trilogy fame, only years before the Ducks. I'm not really a big fan of kids in "horror" movies because it really limits the amount of anything that can be in the film. Although with it being an early 90's film, I wouldn't expect much gore, blood, killing etc anyways. The movie serves it's purpose as far as 1990's Wes Craven film. You'd really have to be in the mood to sit through it.

S.P.R.: C/30

Acting: 6/10

Plot: 8/10

Cinematography: 5/10

Intrigue: 6/10

Extra: 7/10

In & Out (1997):

Starring:

Kevin Klein - Howard Brackett

Joan Cusack - Emily Montgomery

Tom Selleck - Peter Malloy

Matt Dillon - Cameron Drake

Debbie Reynolds - Bernice Brackett

Wilfred Brimley - Frank Brackett

Bob Newhart - Tom Halliwell

Director:
Frank Oz (Little Shop Of Horrors; Dark Crystal)

Synopsis:

A Midwestern teacher questions his sexuality after a former student makes a comment about him at the Academy Awards. 

Review:

A movie I had wanted to see for a very long time, thank you Netflix. So Kevin Klein, playing a secret gay. Hilarious. There are a whole lot of really good laughs in the film. There is an AMAZING scene with Klein where he is listening to a motivational tape trying to make him act more manly & results in some fantastic dance & singing.The best part about the film is, it's not an extremely awkward movie, where you feel uncomfortable because of the way he is treated or any comments made in the film. The down side is you have to look at Joan Cusack's creepy face & great white shark sized mouth talk throughout the movie. Tom Selleck is in the film, but in a completely unacceptable role. There is no way that a man that ruggedly handsome could be that gay. Maybe it's because he shaved his moustache for this film. There is quite a bit of talking & some unimportant plot but it can't all be all action all the time.

S.P.R.: C+/36

Acting: 8/10

Plot: 7/10

Cinematography: 7/10

Intrigue: 7/10

Extra: 7/10

Quantum Of Solace (2008):

Starring:

Daniel Craig - James Bond

Olga Kurylenko - Camille

Mathieu Amalric - Dominic Greene

Dame Judi Dench - M

Giancarlo Giannini - Rene Mathis

Gemma Arterton - Strawberry Fields

Jeffrey Wright - Felix Leiter

David Harbour - Gregg Beam

Jesper Christensen - Mr. White

Director:
Marc Forster (Monster's Ball; Stranger Than Fiction)

Synopsis:

Seeking revenge for the death of his love, secret agent James Bond sets out to stop an environmentalist from taking control of a country's valuable resource. 

Review:

The 22nd installment in the Bond franchise. This review is pretty simple because if you've seen any of the more modern Bond films, or even any of the classic ones, then you know exactly what to expect from this one. You can expect to see Bond fist fighting, shooting, jumping, climbing, diving, dodging, driving & yes of course banging just like every other film. The film takes place immediately after the events in Casino Royale & follows Bond as he tries to discover what happened to him during the film & of course betrayal that befell him. The movie is filmed in the Mediterranean, with a warm, sunny beach & ocean back drop as well as a baron desert. I will say that I personally don't think Daniel Craig is that good of an actor, and this role doesn't really help showcase him at all. He has very limited emotions because he is suppose to be a straight faced, serious secret agent. The upside is you get two gorgeous European babes. Ukrainian Olga Kurylenko & Brit Gemma Arterton are super sexy in the film & are the sexiest girls in the modern Bond films. It's a good action film, but that's about it.

S.P.R.: B-/40

Acting: 8/10

Plot: 8/10

Cinematography: 8/10

Intrigue: 8/10

Extra: 8/10

The Hurt Locker (2008):

Starring:

Jeremy Renner - Sergeant First Class William James

Anthony Mackie - Sergeant JT Sanborn

Brian Geraghty - Specialist Owen Eldridge

Guy Pearce - Staff Sergeant Matt Thompson

Ralph Fiennes - Contractor Team Leader

David Morse - Colonel Reed

Evangeline Lilly - Connie James

 Christian Camargo - Colonel John Cambridge

Director: Kathryn Bigelow

Synopsis:

Forced to play a dangerous game of cat-and-mouse in the chaos of war, an elite Army bomb squad unit must come together in a city where everyone is a potential enemy and every object could be a deadly bomb. 

Review:

Another movie that is truly one of my favourite films.  I will admit that as much as I loved the film, don't know that it should have won the Academy Award for Best Picture, but hey politics right? I am a huge sucker for a good Iraq/Afghanistan war film, even if most of them force their own political views on you or try to expose the truth behind everything. But instead of viewing this with that factor in mind, I'm just going to view it as a film. Just an unbelievable amount of suspense & explosions constantly flying around in this one. The constant pressure that they face throughout the film is almost unbearable at times. Not a lot of down time with unnecessary dialogue or irrelevant plot sequences. Renner's balls out, give it all, try to save the world attitude is an amazing performance. He's come along way from a vampire sired by Angel on the TV show "Angel". The minor roles, not quite cameo's by both Guy Pearce & Ralph Fiennes are completely awesome. Everything is great about this film. SEE THIS FILM!!

S.P.R.: A/47

Acting: 9/10

Plot: 9/10

Cinematography: 10/10

Intrigue: 9/10

Extra: 10/10

The Thing (1982) & The Thing (2011):

Starring: (1982):

Kurt Russell - R.J. MacReady

Wilford Brimley - Dr. Blair

T.K. Carter - Nauls

David Clennon - Palmer

Keith David - Childs

Richard Dysart - Dr. Cooper

Donald Moffat - Garry

Richard Masur - Clark

Joel Polis - Fuchs

Charles Hallahan - Vance Norris

Peter Maloney - George Bennings

Thomas G. Waites - Windows

Director: John Carpenter

Starring: (2011):

 Mary Elizabeth Winstead - Kate Lloyd

Joel Edgerton - Sam Carter

Ulrich Thomsen - Dr. Sander Halvorson

Eric Christian Olsen - Adam Finch

Adewale Akinnuoye-Agbaje - Jameson

Paul Braunstein - Griggs

Trond Espen Seim - Edvard Wolner

Kim Bubbs - Juliette

Jorgen Langehelle - Lars

Jan Gunnar Roise - Olav

Stig Henrik Hoff - Peder

Kristofer Hivju - Jonas

Jo Andrian Haavind - Henrik

Carsten Bjornlund - Karl

Jonathan Walker - Colin

Director: Matthijs van Heijningen Jr.

Synopsis: (1982):

Scientists in the Antarctic are confronted by a shape-shifting alien that assumes the appearance of the people that it kills. 

                                                        Synopsis: (2011):

At an Antarctica research site, the discovery of an alien craft leads to a confrontation between graduate student Kate Lloyd and scientist Dr. Sander Halvorson.

Review:

I decided to do this review as a combined one for three reasons. #1 because I watched them back to back. #2 because the 2nd film (2011) shows how everything that they find in the 1st film (1982) comes to be. & #3 because it's just easier to do it as one post than two. So the premise of the 2011 film was that it is a prequel to the 1982 film, showing how the original Norwegian team dealt with & discovered the alien being. Then the 1982 film would show the American team discovering their research facility & the destruction that the alien caused. Everything that John Carpenter had brought to life in the original is explained in the new one which I thought was just amazing that the director & staff actually cared about the original film & showed that they were passionate about the series or franchise whatever you want to call it. Now if you watch the original (which I highly suggest you do) then you may think that since it was made in 1982 that the effects might look cheesy or stupid. But for the era the effects, the gore, the layout of all the creatures & props what revolutionary. No one had ever seen anything that was so life like & contained such realism. Some of the effects make current films with low budget CGI look underdeveloped in comparison. In the 2011 film the director decided that he wanted to make this movie look as realistic in our current times as the original did. So they film uses several different techniques of special effects including using a animatronic/CGI composite alien during a major scene in the film & through the current abilities in CGI development, it looks pretty damn good. The 1982 film features a cast of big named character actors well known in the industry including Wilfred Brimley, Keith David &  Donald Moffat. Then you have the main role played by Kurt Russell. To me this is the best role that Russell has ever played. His ability to show strength & confidence while also showing fear & uncertainty really draws your interest in to the film. The 2011 film features a smaller amount of well known American character actors such as Olsen & Winstead, but it features something very important to the movie. The director cast real Norwegian actors to play the roles of the Norwegian scientists & adventurers. They are apparently the most well known actors from their country, many of whom are considered to be the biggest celebrities in Norway (take that as you may, sure it's Norway but that is still an amazing concept). Both films have the perfect amount of action, gore, blood, explosions & acting. I say if you're looking for a good sci fi film watch them both!! Also MAJOR Extra points for Mr. Eko from lost, Adewale having a role in the film. LOST REFERENCE!!!

S.P.R.: 1982: B+/44                             2011: B/42

Acting: 9/10                                           Acting: 8/10

Plot: 10/10                                             Plot: 9/10

Cinematography: 8/10                         Cinematography: 8/10

Intrigue: 9/10                                        Intrigue: 9/10

Extra: 8/10                                             Extra: 8/10

Raising Arizona (1987):

Starring:

Nicolas Cage - H.I. McDunnough

Holly Hunter - Edwina "Ed" McDunnough

Trey Wilson - Nathan Arizona

John Goodman - Gale Snoats

William Forsythe - Evelle Snoats

Sam McMurray - Glen

Frances McDormand - Dot

Randall "Tex" Cobb - Leonard Smalls

Director: Joel & Ethan Cohen

Synopsis:

When a childless couple of an ex-con and an ex-cop decide to help themselves to one of another family's quintuplets, their lives get more complicated than they anticipated. 

Review:

Another movie starring one of my favourites, "Academy Award Winner" Nicolas Cage. If you seen a Cohen film before, you know what your getting from this. If not, it's going to be all over the place film, with comedy, enough action to qualify as action & a tiny bit of drama mixed in. I wasn't sure how i felt about the film when I first watched it. I wasn't sure that I actually liked it, but after sometime I decided that I did enjoy it. The film has an amazing cast of great comedians that include a personal favourite John Goodman. Frances McDormand, who is probably the Cohen's favourite person to cast in movies does a great job just like every other Cohen film she is in. However I must say that this film has one acting factor that I cannot stand. There is nothing that I hate more than white trashy, southern, redneck accents & slang. There is just something about it that makes it hard for me to enjoy movies. Weird I know. An earlier film from Cage where he is a little less committed to being a crazy asshole & a little more committed to his acting skills, but the role is to portray a guy who is slightly off so it's perfect for Cage. A convict who at first tried to change his ways, settle down & have a child who then can't handle the life of a father & is constantly tempted by the desire to commit crimes. The only part of the film that was slightly confusing or even hard to follow was the introduction of the "Leonard Smalls" character. He just sort of appears out of nowhere, with no back story, just blowing up shit & hunting down Cage. I guess what should i expect from a Cohen movie but still it left a slight distaste in my mouth.

S.P.R.: C+/41

Acting: 10/10

Plot: 8/10

Cinematography: 7/10

Intrigue: 8/10

Extra: 8/10

I'll Sleep When I'm Dead (2003):

Starring:

Clive Owen - Will

Charlotte Rampling - Helen

Jonathan Rhys Meyers - Davey

Malcolm McDowell - Boad

Jamie Formann - Mickser

Ken Stott - Turner

Sylvia Syms - Mrs. Bartz

Synopsis: 

Will Graham is a gangster who has left the life of crime and is living in the countryside. He comes out of hiding to investigate the death of his brother when he learns that he committed suicide. Charlotte Rampling is his old girlfriend who owns a restaurant. Boad is the villain responsible for the bad things that happened to Will's brother.

Review:

A British gangster film during the time when British crime films were at an all time high in America. However this movie is the slowest moving, uneventful crime/gangster drama film ever. It starts off extremely slow, following Davey (Rhys Meyers) as he does his drug dealing, fornicating usual stuff. Then follows his untimely demise after being raped by an angry Malcolm McDowell. We'll then you meet, living in a van, giant beard, on the lam Clive Owen. Just hanging out in his van down by the river. We'll he thinks he sees his brother at a ferry crossing, & when he goes to investigate, turns out he was just seeing things. So he thinks something is wrong. So he calls his brother Davey without knowing that anything has happened to him. Well, once Mickser (Davey's best friend) gets in touch with Will, who he has been looking for, for months. You find out that Will use to be the largest, most powerful street crime boss in London, but then after some shit went down, he took off. Leaving his family, associated & friends behind. So once he is informed that his brother is dead, he obviously wants revenge on who caused him to die. So then your thought process should be "it's about to pick up". WRONG. You get 45 minutes of Clive Owen, visiting people from his past (who you have never met before & aren't really informed about who they are, it's just sort of implied) trying to figure out who did it. Well once he gets information out of someone (without breaking a knee cap or any fingers) he goes to Malcolm McDowell's house to confront him. FINALLY your thinking "Yes, McDowell is going to get it". WRONG AGAIN!. He breaks into his garage, slashes his tires, McDowell comes out to see why his car alarm is going off & find Owen standing there with a gun. So what does he do? Shoot him in the face? Shoot him in both knee caps? NOPE! Tells him how upset he is & whines about how he use to be the most powerful man & now he's back..... AND WALKS AWAY!!!!!! Acting is decent, production value is low, not worth seeing. Good thing it was a buy one get one free...

S.P.R.: F/20

Acting: 7/10

Plot: 4/10

Cinematography: 5/10

Intrigue: 2/10

Extra: 2/10

The Condemned (2007):

Starring:
"Stone Cold" Steve Austin - Jack Conrad / Jack Riley

Vinnie Jones - McStarley

Robert Mammone - Breckel

Tory Mussett - Julie

Manu Bennett - Paco

Madeleine West - Sarah Cavanagh

Rick Hoffman - "Goldy" Goldman

Christopher Baker - Eddie

Sam Healy - Bella

Nathan Jones - Petr

Masa Yamaguchi - Saiga

Synopsis:
Jack Conrad is awaiting the death penalty in a corrupt Central American prison. He is "purchased" by a wealthy television producer and taken to a desolate island where he must fight to the death against nine other condemned killers from all corners of the world, with freedom going to the sole survivor.

Review:
Another watch & review night. However I did NOT need to watch this one to review it. It holds a very sacred place in my heart. Sure it may be a film with a pro-wrestler as the main star & one of my favourite actors & bad ass mother fuckers Vinnie Jones as the main protagonist. So maybe I do have a slight bias towards the film. I mean it is produced by WWE Films. But to be completely honest, if this film was made by a non-WWE company, with someone else in it as the main star other than Stone Cold, I honestly think it would have been a pretty decent box office success. If Jason Statham or maybe Jet Li (in his prime) as the main role the film could have done well. Not to say that Austin's acting is that terrible, I mean it's as good as you could expect from a pro-wrestler turned actor. But the fact that the main star was a wrestler & it was produced by a wrestling company may have made people & critics avoid it like a hawk. I absolutely love the concept of the film. It's got a feel of Death Race mixed in with like Blood Sport or The Quest. Tons of action with fist & knife fights all over the place. Plus you get a good mixture of different types of actors & characters throughout the film. The production value is actually quite high because the people over at WWE Films wanted to produce a high level action film. I was going to try & give my non-bias opinion of the film, but I honestly don't know that I can. It is a guilty pleasure film for me. You do get tons of cheesy one liners from Austin, not to mention some hilarious looking Stone Cold fight scenes that are 100% reminiscent of his in ring ability. He will never stop throwing those Austin punches. Classic. Vinnie Jones, plays the hammed up, ruthless killer version of every role he plays. Loud mouth British asshole kicking some ass, being cocky & all those other great things you expect from the English bad ass. The acting around them however is super over the top, the characters are all hammed up stereotypes. The crew working for the protagonist are all relatively unknowns, or newer to the business actors who didn't do much before or after the film. I guess when you pay Vinnie Jones more than all 4 of them combined, that's what you should expect. There however is a super hot Australian babe in it, Tory Mussett, however she's done nothing since except Aussie TV. 

S.P.R.: B+/43 (un-bias, non-wrestling fan perspective: C+/39)

Acting: 7/10

Plot: 10/10

Cinematography: 8/10

Intrigue: 8/10

Extra: 10/10

The Shrine (2010):

Starring: 

Aaron Ashmore - Marcus

Cindy Sampson - Carmen

Meghan Heffern - Sara

Ben Lewis - Eric Taylor

Trevor Matthews - Henryk

Monica Bugajski - Emilia

Vieslav Krystyan - Arkadiusz

Synopsis:

A group of young journalists investigate a cult said to practice human sacrifice, but their ambitious ways may lead them to becoming the cult's next victims. 

Review:

 Desperate to find that ultimate story & get out of her job as a lame journalist covering local farmers & events, Carmen (Sampson) looks into a missing persons case from Europe & enlists her clerk Sara (Heffern) & Boyfriend Marcus (Ashmore) to go with her to help find the missing boy. Once they arrive they find themselves in a small eastern European town (one I would imagine that Jaroslaw Lis most likely grew up in) where the town folk want them to leave. Well as they attempt to leave they notice a mysterious fog hanging above the tree line in the distance. Of course they need to go investigate. I would have been happy if they said "we'll fuck it, lets go home" because that would have saved me an 1h45m of my life. As they approach they obviously get split up because who the hell can't keep themselves together in a group. So clerk Sara wanders off into the fog as Marcus & Carmen meet back up. They stand around looking for her until Carmen decides oh well when your scared & lost in the woods first place to go, INTO THE FOG. So she wanders in to look for her, as she goes in eventually Sara comes out. We'll once in Carmen discovers a demonic looking statue in the fog which she investigates, takes a picture & then proceeds past it. But as she walks past it, she looks back & the head has turned & is looking back at her again, but this time with bleeding eyes. So she randomly just runs off in any direction, not the way she came just where ever seemed easiest as you should. Eventually ends up outside the fog inches from Marcus. Then appears a little girl they met before in the village who tells them she knows where the missing boy is. They follow her to a mine shaft where they go down into a small room with coffins in it. The little girls locks them in, they open coffins & one is the missing kid & he has a steel mask over his face that is apparently embedded into his skull or something. They escape, are caught by the locals (who are speaking Polish, but extremely poorly) the girls since they went into the fog get taken away & Marcus is taken separately. We'll if you want to see the ending of this film, DON'T read on. But if you don't care like me then keep reading. So it turns out that the statue has some sort of evil spirit in it & the fog is a warning to keep people out so by going in they allowed the spirit into them. So the locals wearing fancy wizard robes are going to cleans them of the evil by cutting their wrists, ankles & then sledgehammering a steel mask into their eyes so the demon can't escape or something? I have no idea. Then eventually after things happen we get like a exorcist moment where Carmen goes crazy in some rural house & kills some people until the locals come & make the save. Carmen ends up killing what I can only understand as the towns "Grand Dragon" then the second in command dude forces Marcus to help them cleans Carmen.

S.P.R.: C-/24

Acting: 5/10

Plot: 6/10

Cinematography: 5/10

Intrigue: 4/10

Extra: 4/10

Kick-Ass (2010):

Starring:

Aaron Johnson - Dave Lizewski / Kick-Ass

Christopher Mintz-Plasse - Chris D'Amico / Red Mist

Chloë Grace Moretz - Mindy Macready / Hit-Girl

Nicolas Cage - Damon Macready / Big Daddy

Mark Strong - Frank D'Amico

Clark Duke - Marty

Evan Peters - Todd

Lyndsy Fonseca - Katie Deauxma

Michael Rispoli - Big Joe

Dexter Fletcher - Cody

Omari Hardwick - Sgt. Marcus Williams

Synopsis:

Dave Lizewski is an unnoticed high school student and comic book fan who one day decides to become a super-hero, even though he has no powers, training or meaningful reason to do so. 

Review:

Super Hero films will never be the same. This is the graphic novel version of Super Hero movies, with all the blood, gore, beatings & realistic after math of battling evil in the streets. The story of a kid who's sick of bullies & bad guys ruling the streets & takes matters in to his own hands, regardless of the cost to his own body. I'm not going to spend a lot of time trying to critique a film I love because I understand that super hero & graphic novel movies are suppose to be unrealistic & silly, which this one has a lot of both. With an 8 year old girl kicking the most ass in this film of course it's going to be good. The fact that throughout the film the bad guys do shit tons of damage to the heroes as well as the elements of attempting to be a real life hero the film has great action, some laughs & of course the ACADEMY AWARD WINNING acting of Mr. Nicolas Cage. There is one scene in particular that show cases this man's amazing ability to act in any role. (for those of you who have seen it, I'm referring to the fire scene towards the end) Also cameo appearances from Jason Flemyng & Craig Ferguson (as himself on his own show talking about Kick-Ass)

S.P.R.: A/47

Acting: 9/10

Plot: 10/10

Cinematography: 10/10

Intrigue: 9/10

Extra: 9/10

Silent House (2012):

Starring:

Elizabeth Olsen - Sarah

Adam Trese - John

Eric Sheffer Stevens - Peter

Julia Taylor Ross - Sophia

Synopsis:

Trapped inside her family's lakeside retreat, a young woman finds she is unable to contact the outside world as events become increasingly ominous in and around the house. 

Review:
Ah yes, another one of American cinema's wet dreams. Taking an internationally acclaimed films & make their own version of the film to leech off of. We'll I have yet to see the original Uruguayan version of the film (although I do want to). This is one of those lucky times when the remake isn't completely terrible & a mockery of the original. The best part of the film was that it is filmed as one continuous shot, with no cutaways, breaks or stopping. Also the fact that throughout the movie there are realistically only 4 actors/actresses. Elizabeth Olsen (yes younger sister of The Olsen Twins) does an very good job of not only staying in character, not botching her lines but also showing realistic fear, something that I would imagine might be easy since there are no stops. The other actors in the film are overshadowed by Olsen but also by the predictability of the film itself. With the horror genre, a lot of films stay within the general concept of the genre & don't differ from it. This film is no different. The usual things jumping out, it being dark & you seeing something for a brief second all that jazz. The ending however was not quite what I thought it would be. I had my predictions on how it was going to end, I actually thought of 3, but somehow they came up with one I hadn't. Maybe it was just me trying to think of other endings & completely ignored the idea of this one who knows, maybe everyone else figured it out but me. And of course to top it all off... there was something completely dark & quite evil about things that are found out as the build up to the climax. Overall i would say the lack of scares over powers the difference in filming technique & acting of Olsen.

S.P.R.: C+/39

Acting: 8/10

Plot: 7/10

Cinematography: 10/10

Intrigue: 8/10

Extra: 6/10

Summer Catch (2001):
Starring: 
Freddie Prince Jr. -  Ryan Dunne
Jessica Biel - Tenley Parrish
Fred Ward - Sean Dunne

Matthew Lillard - Billy Brubaker

Brian Dennehy - Coach John Schiffner

Jason Gedrick - Mike Dunne

Brittany Murphy - Dede Mulligan

Marc Blucas - Miles Dalrymple

Wilmer Valderrama - Mickey Dominguez

Synopsis:

A rich girl whose family summers on Cape Cod has a romance with a local poor boy who hopes to become a major league baseball player. 

Review:

Cape Cod in summer. Baseball. Romance. Everything America loves. Too bad I'm not American. Let me be forward, the only reason I've ever seen this film was because I'm a sucker for baseball movies... no matter how chick flicky. The baseball in the movie is uhh... limited at best. Other than the limited amount of pitching & the rare home run they show. So right there, I had lost all interest. However you do get a few sexy scene's of Jessica Biel in a swimming pool. The first time in a bikini, the second time in a white t-shirt & her undies. Its your typical young adult, drinking, sex, fighting, jokes summer romp but with the horribleness of Matthew Lillard. The man famous for playing Shaggy in the Scooby Doo movies... Need I say more? Oh also Fez from That 70's Show is in it.... I know not another selling point. I can understand how this is a good chick flick, but from a normal person perspective it sucks. I think Jessica Biel is hot, but a terrible actress. Freddie Prince Jr, despite being a former member of the WWE creative team isn't much better. I am a fan of Fred Ward though, despite his minor role & Brian Dennehy was also enjoyable.

S.P.R.: C/32

Acting: 7/10

Plot: 7/10

Cinematography: 5/10

Intrigue: 6/10

Extra: 7/10

Human Centipede II: Full Sequence (2011):

Starring:

Laurence R. Harvey - Martin

Ashlynn Yennie - Herself

Maddi Black - Candy

Kandace Caine - Karrie

Dominic Borrelli - Paul

Lucas Hansen - Ian

Lee Nicholas Harris - Dick

Dan Burman - Greg

Daniel Jude Gennis - Tim

Katherine Templar - Rachel

Synopsis:

Inspired by the fictional Dr. Heiter, disturbed loner Martin dreams of creating a 12-person centipede and sets out to realize his sick fantasy. 

Review:

I'm not going to lie, there is a small part of me who doesn't want to review this movie because of how much I hated it. The first film in this trilogy (YES there is going to be a 3rd installment of the franchise) was the best comedy movie I had seen in many years. To me it was on level with Borat (2006), Team America: World Police (2004) & Rush Hour 3 (2007) (Chris Tucker f'n cracks my shit uuuuup!). It had better acting than I expected & a somewhat acceptable plot. This is the complete opposite of this film. First of all you have a main character who has no lines, the same facial expression for everything & looks awkward doing any form of physicality. The movie has NO plot, the acting is just terrible & all they did for this was just say "Hey you know all the f'd up shit we didn't put in the first movie, we'll lets just put EVERYTHING in this one". I was going to at least give it the benefit of the doubt that I fast forwarded through like 60% of it. BUT NO! This maybe be in the top 2% worst movies I have ever seen. Now obviously I could just give this movie a 0 for everything, but I also always try to at least see the positive in things. It does take SOME acting ability to have your face shoved up another person's butt & crawl around on all fours, maybe not a lot but definitely more than a 0. The concept of the first movie just being a movie in this film, is different. I wouldn't say good, but different. I don't think I could sugar coat this anymore because it was just awful. I will NOT be seeing the 3rd one whenever it comes out.

S.P.R. F/10

Acting: 2/10

Plot: 2/10

Cinematography: 3/10

Intrigue: 1/10

Extra: 2/10

13 (2011):

Starring:
Sam Riley - Vince Ferro

Jason Statham - Jasper

Mickey Rourke - Jefferson

Michael Shannon - Henry

 Ray Winstone - Ronald Lynn Bagges

David Zayas - Detective Larry Mullane

Curtis "50 Cent" Jackson - Jimmy

Alexander Skarsgård - Jack

Synopsis:

A naive young man assumes a dead man's identity and finds himself embroiled in an underground world of power, violence, and chance where men gamble behind closed doors on the lives of other men. 

Review:

A straight to DVD film that had the potential to be entertaining. It definitely has the action-star power that could carry the film, BUT it doesn't. The main reason is because even though Statham, Rourke & Winstone as the main draws for the film, they are all secondary & minor characters to unknown actors who have been cast in the main roles or the roles that are important in the plot. A Plot which when I first saw a trailer for the film, the concept of it was awesome. The concept of the film is that rich & powerful men from all over the world travel to to New York City to gamble on an underground Russian roulette tournament. They each bring their own participant who is guaranteed money if they survive. Throughout the course of the tournament new bets can be placed & sometimes they trade who they represent with someone who has already lost there participant for money. That is where the movie stops being remotely interesting & follow-able. So this kid, who's father is dieing of an accident & that his family cannot afford to pay the bills, gets a job working for a family as an electrician. When he over hears the owner of the house & some guy who they never give a name or identity to (played by former UFC Light Heavyweight Champ Forrest Griffin) he finds about about the roulette ring. But of course then he overdoses on heroine the night before the tournament, so Vince takes his spot in the game, much to the dislike of the men in charge they can't go on without players. Each is assigned a number Vince is given "13", Aw cute that's the title of the film.... They are all placed in a giant circle, given a gun with one bullet to start, they must spin the round until they are told to stop, point it at the back of the guy in front's head & then when a light bulb turns on, they have to pull the trigger. I guess i don't really need to explain Russian roulette but that's the jist of it. Well from there you get a cluster f' of plot holes, just random b.s. of characters back stories that are completely uninteresting & unimportant. Not to mention that HORRIBLE acting of Sam Riley. You would think that going from an average, suburban Ohio kid who is just trying to help his father live to a kid with a gun, who may or may not kill the man standing in front of him would be a major change in character. Well you would be wrong. Other than an early scene where he is in the first round & doesn't pull the trigger, his acting is bland, poor & consists of the wrong emotion or no emotion from a kid who has just shot people in the back of the head. Then after they get down to the final 6 they go to "The Duel" which is just one vs one until they get down to two. However, they just kind of skip ahead to final without showing anything between the draw & that. The ending/climax is very fast, predictable & un-suspenseful. The fact of the matter is because of the poor acting, the amount of irrelevant plot & the poor production value your never invested in the main character of Vince & you don't ever cheer for him to survive because we'll lets face it, you don't give an f' by this point. Mickey Rourke was decent even though his role was small & he didn't have a tons of line. Jason Statham was also decent, however he didn't have to do a whole lot of acting, just a lot of being in the shot & reacting. You do get to see him cry towards the end as his brother (played by Winstone) loses but it's not enough to say he was good. 50 Cent is barely in it but gets a top billing on the DVD, his acting is horrible, it is almost like they had to dumb down his lines so he could actually remember them. Alexander Skarsgård was actually the best in the film but again he had a minor role with limited camera time & lines. Bonus points for a cameo appearance from Pride & UFC Veteran Don "Predator" Frye!

S.P.R.: D/28

Acting: 5/10

Plot: 6/10

Cinematography: 4/10

Intrigue: 6/10

Extra: 5/10